{"id":1575,"date":"2015-11-05T19:16:59","date_gmt":"2015-11-05T19:16:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.nannyjob.co.uk\/blog\/?p=1575"},"modified":"2015-11-05T19:16:59","modified_gmt":"2015-11-05T19:16:59","slug":"3-ways-to-better-manage-behaviour","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.nannyjob.co.uk\/blog\/3-ways-to-better-manage-behaviour\/","title":{"rendered":"3 ways to better manage behaviour"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

Observe<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

Obviously we\u2019re always watching children but simply watching is very different to keenly observing with an objective in mind. If you\u2019re notice a pattern of negative behaviour make a special effort to observe and find the triggers. Sometimes the incidents seem random but there may be a bigger pattern behind it \u2013 common causes are unexpected tiredness, over-stimulation, teeth coming through. Sometimes it\u2019s linked to something that we\u2019re doing, albeit unintentionally. A child who doesn\u2019t know what is expected of them will lash out when confused. This is particularly noticeable when children are growing in independence and learning new skills, but at the same time the mistakes they make are behaviours we don\u2019t want to encourage. It\u2019s difficult to learn to drink from an open cup without spilling once or twice.<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

It may seem counter-intuitive to stand back once in a while and let bad behaviour happen but it may give you valuable clues to what sparked it off, particularly if you can\u2019t find another cause. This is different to letting children tantrum it out because you\u2019ve once again thwarted their master plan, and is obviously not to be tried when a child is physically hurting you or someone else, but to go back to the drink spilling example if a child is constantly knocking over their cup it might be that they\u2019re trying to pick it up to drink by themselves rather than being \u2018naughty\u2019.<\/p>\n

Reinforce<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

We all know to praise children when they\u2019re doing well, and that praise should be as specific as possible rather than a generic \u2018good boy\/girl\u2019 or \u2018well done\u2019 but it\u2019s easy to forget. It\u2019s also easy to slip into the trap of only praising when there\u2019s exceptionally good behaviour rather than reinforcing everyday positives. Be genuine when reinforcing good behaviour \u2013 use a positive tone of voice and get down to their level.<\/p>\n

If you choose to use rewards as reinforcements then link the behaviour to the reward. \u2018You tidied up so quickly that we can play <insert favourite game>\u2019 will encourage a child to tidy up quickly in the future. Be consistent with rewards until the behaviour is well ingrained and then reduce the frequency while increasing the stakes to moderate the expectation.<\/p>\n

Rephrase<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

If you find yourself constantly telling your child \u2018don\u2019t run\u2019, \u2018stop hitting\u2019, \u2018no throwing balls inside\u2019 then think about how you\u2019re conveying the message. \u2018Please walk\u2019, \u2018keep your hands to yourself\u2019, \u2018you can roll the ball inside\u2019 or \u2018we throw balls outside\u2019 are much clearer and give the child a clear steer on what they should be doing. Children\u2019s understanding of different types of negation continues to develop long after they learn the word \u2018no\u2019, which is often among the first words to appear (here\u2019s<\/a>\u00a0a very interesting research paper if you want to find out more).<\/p>\n

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Observe Obviously were always watching children but simply watching is very different to keenly observing with an objective in mind. If youre notice a pattern of negative behaviour make a special effort to observe and find the triggers. Sometimes the incidents seem random but there may be a bigger pattern behind it common causes are … Continue reading “3 ways to better manage behaviour”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[40,59,96,296,299,378,483],"class_list":["post-1575","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-childcare","tag-au-pairs","tag-behaviour-management","tag-childminder","tag-nannies","tag-nanny","tag-parents","tag-tantrums"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nannyjob.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1575","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nannyjob.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nannyjob.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nannyjob.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nannyjob.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1575"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.nannyjob.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1575\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nannyjob.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1575"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nannyjob.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1575"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nannyjob.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1575"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}