References

When employing a nanny it’s vitally important to take up references and most nannies request a written reference at the end of a position. Ex-nanny employers should expect to be contacted by parents even 10 years down the line, as for some nannies this might still be within the ‘most recent’ referees.

A written reference for a nanny should confirm the dates of employment and duties as a bare minimum. It’s also nice to include anything the nanny did particularly well and give concrete examples of how they performed their duties. Comments on reliability and timekeeping, ability to deal with emergencies and the nanny’s general attitude towards the children and the job provide a good starting point for anyone checking the reference verbally. Written references need to be neutral, sticking to very basic factual information, or positive. It’s not against the law to give a ‘bad’ reference (although we would recommend that anyone who feels they can’t give a broadly positive reference seeks individual legal advice) but a written reference is not the place to raise any disciplinary issues.

An ex-employer is obliged to give an honest and fair reference. Essentially this means not holding back information where you can prove what you’re saying. If someone asks whether there were ever any issues raised with the nanny or whether any disciplinary action was taken a fair reference must respond truthfully. It’s intended to be fair to the employee and the future employer after all.

Disciplinary action is an easy question to answer, and a reason why it’s important to keep records of formal warnings. If there was no disciplinary action then no need to worry! Broader performance management is a finer line. It’s expected that at the beginning nannies will be given feedback, and unless the nanny didn’t respond to that it would be unfair to mention it in a future reference. A reference shouldn’t mention anything a nanny hasn’t been given an opportunity to correct, so if a nanny was consistently late but there was no conservation about lateness then a nanny could easily argue they weren’t able to act on this and improve their timekeeping.

Most previous employers will give an unreservedly glowing reference, focusing on the quality of the nanny’s relationship with the children, and that’s a really good sign of a great nanny because it shows a lasting positive impact. Their tone of voice and willingness to answer questions will say a lot about how genuine their feelings are, and that’s one reason why it’s important to follow up written or email references with a phone call. A final test for a reference is to ask whether in the same situation they would employ the nanny again. It goes without saying that you’d expect the answer there to be a ‘yes’.

Parent v Nanny

Today we’ve got a special guest blog from Tanya, talking about her transition from being a nanny to motherhood.

 

I qualified as a nursery nurse over 15 years ago. Since then I have worked with children of all ages from 3 months up to 12 years both in educational settings and as a Nanny.

In October 2009 I found out I was expecting our first child. At that time I had been with my current family for 4 years, caring for 2 children.

I felt pretty well equipped for once baby came home etc. but was fairly nervous about the actual delivery! Fear of the unknown I suppose.

I was lucky enough to be given ante-natal classes as a gift from my employers. My husband and I were keen to meet people at the same stage as we were and learn a bit more about the imminent delivery! The people we met at class gave us a great support network for once baby arrived. The classes also provided good information about the weeks ahead and of course the all important delivery!

Lily arrived a week early. An easy pregnancy ended with a slightly less easy delivery. Once she did arrive emotions were definitely altered forever.

The obvious main difference in being a parent is ultimately your decision is final, which sometimes feels very daunting.

In my role as a nanny I work with parents and discuss ideas to improve or manage various situations or scenarios. I’m not the type of nanny who expects the parents to do everything my way but work more as a team to get better results.

As a parent you are more aware of making decisions and how this will affect your lives. I think having a newborn and the tiredness and emotions that go along with this made it much harder to work through phases.

As a nanny I also had fairly fixed ideas of how I was going to ‘manage’ my new baby. Due to various reasons this didn’t happen and I did feel under extra pressure to do the ‘right’ thing. Ultimately the ‘right’ thing is that you feel comfortable in your daily decisions and that you and baby are happy and settled.

Outside pressure also affected me a lot. I was lucky to have lots of friends who work in childcare or who have their own children (or both!). Obviously everyone likes to help and support a friend and advice was always welcome. However they all had their own words of wisdom. At the time I felt I should take every point if view on board rather than do what was best for us as a family.

Having a ‘difficult’ baby isn’t easy and even my years of training didn’t prepare me for the constant demands of being a mummy. Of course I would never change being a mummy but there is definitely something to be said for clocking on and off as a nanny!

As Lily has got older she has become a very lively, funny and inquisitive girl. She likes to push boundaries and has a very strong sense of being her own person. Of course as a nanny working through the terrible twos and potty training is just part of the job. As a parent it’s non stop – no finishing at 6pm, having to be on top of a situation 100% of the time and multitasking household chores. You forget as a nanny you are there just for the children and that’s what you are paid to do so anything extra gets put to one side.

As a working mum, I still nanny part time with Lily coming along too. Time can seem limited but we try to do things together everyday and Lily gets to do a variety of activities. Consistency is key and we try hard to keep the rules the same regardless of if we are at home, at work, or just out and about. She’s not perfect but she’s 3 and spirited.

For me being a mum is a much harder job than being a nanny but I’m sure this isn’t the case for everyone!

 

Be Beyoncé’s nanny?

Well, no not really… Unfortunately we don’t to the best of our knowledge have it listed on our site, but feel free to go and have a look in case it’s there!

What we’re really interested in is the requirements they, and other celebs have for the person who will be looking after their little bundles, and not everyone has the luxury of bringing their old nanny out of retirement like Prince William.

So Beyoncé and Jay-Z want a French speaker who is happy to travel. They’ll also almost certainly have the reasonable requirement that you maintain strict confidentiality, and that would include protecting little Blue Ivy from nosy journalists and paparazzi, and that you provide top-notch care for their little princess.

It seems languages are a pretty common requirement for celeb nannies. It’s got to help with the travelling, although Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin took it to extremes wanting a tutor to speak not only one but FOUR languages to their 5 year old, including Latin and Greek. Brad Pitt and Angeline Jolie insist that their nannies (yes, plural, each child has one) have a degree in child development or education and speak that child’s native language, which considering the multi-cultural make-up of their family we think is a lovely idea.

Sometimes the requirements can get a little out of hand. Alanis Morisette was in the news for reportedly insisting her nanny worked 12 hour shifts without any break to eat or go to the loo unless someone else was in the room with the (sleeping) child. Although 24/7 cover is definitely not that unusual, after all the stars are out at all hours of the night and someone has to babysit, most employers will at least appreciate that a nanny who faints from hunger or is desperate to use the bathroom isn’t going to be the most effective caregiver and celebrity nannies often work in teams. Going to back to little Blue Ivy, she apparently has 6.

Although celebrities, like everyone else, want to give their kids the best start in life (hence the French speaker for that linguistic head start), what’s most important is that their children are safe and well-cared for when they can’t be around, just like everyone else.

Here at Nannyjob we say GOOD LUCK with finding the best possible nanny for Blue Ivy, and if that turns out to be you, we understand that you won’t be able to let us know!